Dear Bayside,
90 days ago I did a Zoom interview with Andrew and Curt. It was my second conversation with Bayside, but it was the moment my mind suddenly realized my life could be drastically changing in a very short period of time. Three months later, I’m living in California.
Let me ask the question my mother is probably still asking…why?
For the past 19 years, I’ve been a Teaching Pastor and (for the past 13 years) Lead Pastor of Community Bible Church in my hometown of Fort Smith, AR. I lived across the driveway from my mom. It was an amazing two decades of not only watching a church grow from 300 to near 1700 (pre-covid), but also having children and watching them grow up with their grandparents, aunts/uncles, and cousins.
Why would anyone leave their hometown, a healthy church, and a loving family?
The reason is simple…your marriage is worth it.
Eight years ago, I began the discipline of writing on a routine basis. This blog was the accountability partner I needed in order to accomplish a long dream of mine…to be a writer. Having spent the greater part of a decade simply speaking, I started the blog in order to ensure that I would write on a regular basis. (Want to connect more? Find me here: Twitter, Facebook, Instagram)
A few weeks into the process, I had nothing to write about so I wrote what I thought was the most basic/elementary piece of marriage advice ever written. I assumed everyone knew the idea I was presenting. To my surprise, the article wasn’t ignored. Instead, it was widely read. That began the habit of writing every Wednesday on the topic of marriage. Over time, a few of those posts were picked up by other outlets and garnered millions of views. This led to an agent, a book deal, and conferences. But more importantly, it has led to restored relationships, healthy marriages, and many children being raised by their mom and dad rather than splitting time between the two.
This is an outcome worth my total focus. When Bayside presented me with the opportunity to narrow my focus onto creating content that would strengthen marriages and families, I was intrigued. When looking at the state of our church, the season of our family, and the opportunity presented, it seemed like a perfect fit. So three weeks ago, the dog and me (and my golf clubs) got in a car and began to drive westward in order to meet my wife and children (who flew) in California.
To me, your marriage is worth it. Worth the change, stress, and grief that comes with a move. It’s worth the time, effort, and energy of creating content and climates in which your relationship will be strengthened. It’s worth all the upheaval because of what God can do when two people intentionally focus on loving each other.
If your marriage is worth it for me, I hope it’s worth it for you. Imagine if three years from now your marriage is in the healthiest spot it has ever been, you have surrounded yourself with a loving community of people who care for you, and you have positively influenced your friends, family, co-workers, and neighbors strengthening their relationships as well. That’s what can happen if we take the teachings of Jesus and apply them at home. That is the task before us.
About Our Family
While I hope to meet each of you, I also hope you have the opportunity to meet our family. Each has a unique contribution to make to Bayside.
Jenny and I met in college. (We actually met before that but she ignored me.) We’ve been married for 21 years. She is originally from Oklahoma and prefers to stay behind the scenes if possible, hosting, organizing, and serving. She is the owner of Forte Media Partners, a full service advertising and marketing company. While her plate is continually full, she always thinks she has time to accomplish one more thing.
Ella is 16. For ten years she has talked about her sweet 16 birthday party and we were able to have that party the day before news broke we were moving to California. Her two favorite things are people and snacks. She has her own cooking channel on YouTube and will happily accompany you to any fine restaurant you desire. You will want to befriend her in hopes that she will make you some cookies.
Silas is 13. He’s funny, smart, and always looking for a way to one-up me. While both Jenny and I are introverted, Silas is even a bit more shy when you first meet him, but he’s a loyal friend once those bonds are made. He has a variety of tastes and since we have moved to California desires to go to the beach or Tahoe every weekend.
So Now What
Following our marriage conference on September 10-11, Pastors Curt and Andrew will join me for four Wednesday nights as we teach through Fearless Families. This study is for every person, married or single. It especially applies to parents in every stage. Join us in the room or, if you live outside the region, we can connect with the online study.
It’s an honor to join the family at Bayside. I look forward to seeing all that God does through our efforts.
Blessings,
Kevin
Understated, elegant and self effacing.what’s not said…you’re quirky humorous, kind, tender, always appropriate, and there in times of need or loss with support, prayers and Spiritual wisdom. Truly, you’re a man of God, intensely enlightened, a Shepherd gently leading his sheep. I love you Pastor Kevin. I know you are the answer to many prayers in your new church family. ♥️
I’m not feeling well!! Are you coming back for Christmas? LOL
blessings to Bayside, please cover Kevin, Jenny, Ella & Silas with you kindness & encouragement. Soon you will begin to discover the great gift we are sharing with you. It was hard to know they were leaving but I know their gifts will be multiplied there and blessings will abound. They are special.
Welcome! We’re glad to have you in the family!
Thank you very much for joining Bayside! I am thrilled to have you one of my pastor here. Thank you for all the effort on Wednesday nights providing me with helpful tips and great wisdom about marriage, relationship, communications, forgiveness!
Thank you!
Thank you for preaching today, 4/10/22
Truth, powerfully given… you started with a pet peeve ministry leaders, workers not responding to calls, texts or emails. I deal with this often as a vendor and ministry board member, Alternatives Pregnancy Center.
The call to stay, be light, salt in California, amen and amen.
To the fire of the finish, Jesus be Lord, come quickly.
Be honored to share lunch sometime with you, cell 916-601-1824
Blessings brother!
Dear Pastor Kevin, I am working on my relationship… have been for several years now… seems to be a dry well, but have not given up trying. It is clearly a process that I have failed at for many years. We are in a very deep hole from my perspective and her’s too. I want you to know I’ve listened to your August 21… week 3 sermon several times now and am encouraging my spouse to engage God through you and Bayside as well. your series is most important tome at this time in my life. Thank you for your efforts on behalf me and others. I regularly pray for God to help us… and really know so little as to how to do it or how we might proceed. I just have to keep trying. Thank you for helping me and hopefully my spouse to become closer to God and hopefully to one another in the process.
We have actually met and played golf together with a mutual friend. Your character and your messaging has touched me deeply. God Bless,
Hey, brother. Listened to the Daily Show podcast and almost wept–so many things resonated. My wife and I left our small reformed baptist church in Vacaville a couple of years ago and have not found another local church to attend. Just don’t understand Christians in America anymore. Anyway, just wanted to say thanks for your transparency, courage, and integrity. God bless.
Enjoyed the podcast interview re: your time in AK. Welcome to CA.
God bless.
Brother Kevin,
This is Dennis and Christina Treadaway. So pleased to speak with you for a minute or two after the service at Hills.
We know you have a lot on your plate. Praying that you will find encouragement, hope, strength, renewal, peace, and rest.
The Holy Spirit has anointed you, my friend.
He has given you the gift of teaching and preaching. Your passion is palpable.
May the Lord bless you and keep you
Hi
I would like to know about couples therapy/counselling services with Kevin please.
Thank you
We absolutely loved your message Confidence Changes Everything!!! One of the very best at Bayside!!! You are greatly appreciated and we are very thankful for you. May the Lord bless you and your family!
The Scatena Family