Apr 152013 1 Response

A Leadership Habit Which Can Transform Marriage

If you walk on the beach in the same direction for thirty minutes something funny happens when you turn around—you hear the ocean.

The sound coming into your ear is no different than what you have heard for the previous half-hour, but receiving the noise through a different ear changes one’s awareness. A simple change of perspective heightens the awareness of what is present.

This is a key principle for leadership—changing perspective increases awareness. 

The CBS show Undercover Boss is built around this idea. CEOs work incognito in various jobs throughout their organization in order to get a different viewpoint on their company. Valuable lessons are always learned.

One of the easiest ways for a leader to gain new information is to change perspectives. It can bring to light things which have become so routine they are now ignored.

To what have you grown deaf?

  • Your career goals
  • The slow death of your spouse’s heart
  • The frustration of your co-workers
  • Your child’s desire to spend time with you

There is no telling what is shouting at you, but your ear is deaf because you’ve heard the noise for so long. An intentional change of perspective can let you hear again.

Good leaders find ways to interact with their organizations in different formats in order to gain new insights. They visit stores, talk to customers, walk through the shop, or do whatever it takes to see their company from a different angle.

This work habit has the ability to influence marriage.

Relationships are built on routine. One of the great benefits of marriage is that two people naturally fall into habits which get tasks accomplished without much dialogue. But the danger of marriage is that these habits which make life easier can quickly becomes ruts which endanger a marriage.

The solution—change perspective. Find a way to break free from the routine in order to get a different look at your relationship.

Several ways to change perspectives in marriage:

Have a date night.

Switch tasks. If one spouse works while the other stays home with the kids, switch for a week. It won’t take a week for the  Experience what the other spouse experiences on a daily basis.

Take a vacation. Nothing can bring vitality to a relationship like a vacation without kids. Free from the responsibilities of work and parenting, a couple can rediscover why they fell in love. They can find the time to talk about all the issues which have been pushed to the side. They can renegotiate the hundreds of agreements which have been made in order to accomplish every task which must be completed to keep a family running. 

Leaders know the danger of living in a bubble where important information never finds them. Good leaders make an intentional effort to look at their organizations from a different perspective in order to garner important information. The same can be done in marriage.

What are some ways to see your marriage from a different perspective?



One Response to A Leadership Habit Which Can Transform Marriage
  1. […] Isn’t this why I’m insistent that every couple vacation together (without kids) once a y... https://www.kevinathompson.com/wonder-dont-love

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